Maybe it’s just knowing what we’ve done that makes us cower before the possible. Knowledge that you wind up in one of three categories sooner or later.
A) Doing. Conquering. Killing. Conquesting. Genociding. Crusading.
You become a Christopher Columbus. You become an Adolph Hitler. You become a crusader. You destroy millions of lives. You leave a plume of smoke in your wake. Yeah, sure you get blood on your hands, but we’re sort of impressed, aren’t we? (You must get up awfully early in the morning.)
B) You speak up in the face of this malfaisance. Then you get the chopping block. (Notable alumni: Jesus. He seems to be the only one who’s gotten away with it.)
C) You do nothing. Which is what you’re doing right now. You’re not comfortable with it, but could you be anymore comfortable with the alternatives?
To be fair, I guess there’s choice D as well: Despairing. Realising that you are no more than a cog, a consumer, a part of the problem and so forth so you just get on the fast track to where everyone else is heading one day and kill yourself. How very, very selfish of you.
You know, I’ve been thinking about going up to the street preacher at school and thanking him. I’m sure I don’t agree with a thing he has to say but I love that there’s somebody out there who gives a damn. I appreciate that he goes home at night and comes up with great posters to help me understand visually with that tiny scrap of intellect left to me by my life of homosexualist debauchery that I am going to hell and, also, that Satan is my daddy. No really, I’ve been thinking about bringing him a coffee or making him cookies but I don’t want him to try and exorcise a demon.
I wish that I could give a shit the way that he does – and with the sort of perspective he’s got. Hell I’m just woried about making it through each day without getting a surprise evualuation while I’m teaching and figuring out how I’m going to finance the booze fund. I legitimately wish I could get my frame of mind into this sort of perspective.
Unfortunately this usually involves someone dying so, you know, my wish isn’t that pressing.